Iona Winter

Ubiquitous, the word blazed in my frontal lobe upon waking this Christmas morn. Unfortunately, at such an early hour I had no idea what it meant.  Not being one for assuming pompous airs or pretending to be smarter than I am, I reached for my tome of a dictionary by the bed – every writer has one of those, I’m sure. It said, “Existing or seeming to be everywhere at the same time; frequently encountered.” I wondered what on earth I had been dreaming about beforehand!

Over a leisurely breakfast of pancakes and summer berries, I reflected upon how relaxed I felt NOT doing a traditional Christmas (for the first time in 40+ years). It was so easy, BUT I felt a niggle of guilt. Was I letting my family down?  We (me and boyo) decided this year that we wouldn’t celebrate Christmas, and chose to do Solstice instead. The later of which seemed much more important – to celebrate our survival post-potential end of the world zombie apocalypse!

Over the past week, where possible, I’ve avoided the festively decorated malls with their carols playing on infinite repeat. Furthermore avoiding people and traffic…I have only ventured out when absolutely necessary (for chocolate and beer). Does that sound Grinch-like? I didn’t get caught up in the pre-Christmas ubiquitous madness which descends over the city like a dense mist. Somehow I remained untouched by people’s pushing and shoving when I did venture out.  I felt oddly disconnected, like being wrapped in an invisibility cloak Harry Potter style, and wondered why I hadn’t thought of NOT buying (pardon the pun) into the consumerism which grips the general populous before.

I also looked up Christmas in my tome and it said: “festival of the Christian Church commemorating the birth of Christ” – I knew that bit. My tome went on to say ” the festival season from Christmas Eve til the Epiphany on 6 January.” I didn’t know that bit, about the time frames.

OK I’ll be honest, I have thought of NOT doing Christmas before (MANY TIMES) but felt too guilty to pull off a coup. For years I’ve hinted (in increasingly louder tones) that I’d rather spend the holiday season relaxing (since it’s usually the only time I get off work that lasts a couple of weeks)…maybe on a tropical island (if I had money) or somewhere near a beach – far away from the city – in a tent.

This year I was brave, I verbalised my desire to NOT do Christmas and promoted the idea of celebrating Solstice together instead. I had a comprehensive list of justifications up my sleeve, ready to be pulled out with a flourish at the slightest sign of cracks appearing in my fortitude:

• A realistic angle: The kids are all grown up….zero possibility of experiencing the joy derived from cherubic little faces lighting up as presents are unwrapped.
• An honest angle: We aren’t practising Catholics or Presbyterians….not in my lifetime anyhow.
• A Green angle: We don’t need to buy each other presents…haven’t we all got enough stuff?
• A retrospective angle: There are often arguments on Christmas Day and I’ve recently come out as “Conflict Avoidant”.
• A personalised angle: There is always stress around Christmastime and I’m trying to de-stress my lifestyle these days.
• A practical angle: Solstice is a better day, the weather forecast is perfect…we can have a BBQ.
• An ancestral angle: Our ancestors (both Celtic and Maori) would’ve celebrated Solstice rather than Christmas. Things are different in our hemisphere…for a start it’s not the middle of winter.

In the end I used ALL the justifications anyway, for added effect. I braced myself for harsh, guilt inducing replies. The expected derision didn’t come, my suggestion was accepted with grace…surprisingly I thought I heard a collective sigh of relief. Why hadn’t I been brave enough before?

The 95% humidity in Auckland today is ubiquitous, as are the flies…but I am relaxed, with a good book, a nice cold drink and am dreaming of my tropical island. Perhaps next year I will volunteer at the City Mission on Christmas Day. The idea of making the day special, for someone who needs it to be so, feels much more important. My epiphany (with a small e) came early this year…I won’t be waiting for Jan 6th!!