Iona Winter

I have noticed (since I’ve been writing more) that I see spelling mistakes leaping out from other peoples pages. BUT it’s becoming increasingly more difficult to see them on my own pages. Why is that? Because I need new glasses? Maybe. Do other people notice spelling mistakes too? Maybe I should’ve been a teacher. Hang on a minute, that’s right, I did apply in my youth…and they didn’t want me.

I saw an advert today for a phone for the “spear” room. Straight away my mind whirred into action – a spear room. Naturally I imagined what it would look like. A room full of spears duh. Seriously though, something inside my writers brain notices these things and automatically creates a scene.

To be honest, I find computer spell checkers annoying (sometimes). There are so many words, from here in Aotearoa, New Zealand, that aren’t in your bog standard spell-checker dictionary. And now, perhaps because my novel has grown exponentially, the spell checker picks up nothing. It’s given up. It’s exhausted. I don’t know why. Obviously a formatting problem…sigh.

I think I would’ve liked to be a spell-checker in the old days. The job would suit me well. Reading typed pages of text all day, red pen in hand, sitting in a large well-stuffed and comfortable chair, cups of tea within arm’s reach. Notice I avoid looking at the downside of this position? I briefly imagine the stress involved, and a wee man shouting at me, “Is that page ready yet?”

While I can pick out spelling mistakes at one hundred paces, I’m re-thinking my fantasy around aforementioned spell-checker job. The stress would probably mean I’d end up having words with the wee man, telling him to stuff his job (somewhere devoid of light), throwing the pages (and red pen) at his feet and stomping off.

Back to the spell-checker issue. I guess this means I need to re-format ‘The Novel’. I wonder if there’s a google search I can do?

Without indulging further fantasies about old-school jobs and typewriters, I guess I’d best be off.